This cold is too stressful I need to stay inside!

Well, I just was outside and it's 14F.  I love the cold but even I admit that's pretty frigid. The thing that stresses me out about the cold is not the cold itself but the plethora of Winter Warriors who want to defy the cold. For some reason I still see people on the streets with shorts, skirts with no tights and yes, even no coats.  What is the deal with these people?  I like the cold but frost bite that I'm not a fan of and you shouldn't be either. Seriously, you are so cool now put a coat on.

Caveat Emptor!

Last night the grocery store had oranges and pineapples for $1.00 each. Of course I thought that was pretty expensive for and orange and pretty cheap for a pineapple. So as an experiment I bought them.  Well, for one buck I was expecting an awesome orange and I was terribly disappointed. However, the $1 pineapple was a pleasant surprise! Live and learn!

Does this scale make me look fat?

Last week I started a diet. Yeah who in their right mind starts a diet in the middle of the holidays. Read my blog, clearly I'm not in my right mind. Day 2 - down four pounds or so I thought. Day 3 - I seemed to be back up. How is that possible when I make frequent visits to the gym and have barely eaten?? Oh its not me it's the scale! Apparently, I weigh various amounts when the scale is placed in various positions on the floor. Awesome! So now I can lose weigh with out even trying! I just need to find that perfectly unbalanced place in the floor where the scale reflects a number less than I really weigh! Think I'll re-start the diet come the new year!

No, there are stupid questions!

People say there is no such thing as a stupid question. Well, spend a day with me at work and you will see. Today someone called with one of my all time favorites. Listening to my voice mail the message said Hi! It's Joe! Call me back I have a question for you about my personal income taxes. I wrote down the name and number and then quickly ran outside to check the sign in the lobby and see if I had been transported to my local IRS office or maybe one of the large accounting firms. NOPE! I still worked in the same office, one that doesn't do any work with your personal income taxes. I braced myself and dialed the number. The receptionist had a million questions for me and I just politely asked to be connected with "Joe No Last Name". Quickly I told Joe I was not a tax professional but Joe informed me it was probably a really stupid question. Fire away I said. "Well, how do the taxes on my property get paid?" And then I dropped the bombshell. Joe you have to pay the taxes on your own property. Unfortunately, the tax fairy has gone to the big IRS office in the sky. "Oh I thought that was how it worked" Joe replied. And pretty much our conversation ended there. I would hate to see the bill because this is NYC and Joe has lived there for over 2 years!

Some people need to be told everything...

The botanical gardens had what I thought was the most ridiculous sign posted. But maybe I'm incorrect. Honestly, there was no one else near these cacti when I saw them so I can't state factually that people touch them. However, there were many other items that had signs not to touch and people couldn't take their hands off them.

Hey kid, I guess you were never a boy scout!

Yesterday, I went out in the car to do some errands. It was raining, had been for hours and the forecast indicated it would continue. On a major throughfare I encounterd a motorcyclist who apparently has not checked the weather. He is wearing jeans, t-shirt and a short helmet. We stop at a light and he reaches into his back pack and I think "oh he's getting out his rain gear". No, he pulls out a pair of sunglasses and places them on his face. Now it's pouring and he has to be soaked. I'm thinking this guy was never a boy scout because he's totally unfamiliar with the motto "Be prepared".

Smart TV

What's up with these cable television companies? The rates are astronomical, the service is bad and today I wanted to throw the DVR out the window. For the amount of money I pay for basic television service and the DVR, someone should come here and change the channel for me. So aside from shoddy service on days there is bad weather, or even outages due to it sometimes I feel like I'm watching a foreign movie with a bad dub job. I hear words and then I see lips moving or vice a versa. Honestly, those mild issues I can ignore. My deal breaker for cable is how the DVR works. For some reason, most days it records the show just before it ends. Of course it's always a cliff hanger too!. The good guy is hanging off the roof by his finger nails while the bad guy proceeds to tap dance on his hands and then the next second I see - Save - Delete - Restart. Awesome! I find it just as irritating when I tape one show then go to watch it and it's a totally different show. It says the correct title but the taped show isn't even close to what I wanted. I should blame the actual television station for changing the programming. But honestly isn't that little box under the TV smart enough to figure out what I want to see? No? I mean for $82 a month and you get aggravation with it? I better buy stock in antacids or cut cable out of my life!