Some people need to be told everything...

The botanical gardens had what I thought was the most ridiculous sign posted. But maybe I'm incorrect. Honestly, there was no one else near these cacti when I saw them so I can't state factually that people touch them. However, there were many other items that had signs not to touch and people couldn't take their hands off them.

Hey kid, I guess you were never a boy scout!

Yesterday, I went out in the car to do some errands. It was raining, had been for hours and the forecast indicated it would continue. On a major throughfare I encounterd a motorcyclist who apparently has not checked the weather. He is wearing jeans, t-shirt and a short helmet. We stop at a light and he reaches into his back pack and I think "oh he's getting out his rain gear". No, he pulls out a pair of sunglasses and places them on his face. Now it's pouring and he has to be soaked. I'm thinking this guy was never a boy scout because he's totally unfamiliar with the motto "Be prepared".

Smart TV

What's up with these cable television companies? The rates are astronomical, the service is bad and today I wanted to throw the DVR out the window. For the amount of money I pay for basic television service and the DVR, someone should come here and change the channel for me. So aside from shoddy service on days there is bad weather, or even outages due to it sometimes I feel like I'm watching a foreign movie with a bad dub job. I hear words and then I see lips moving or vice a versa. Honestly, those mild issues I can ignore. My deal breaker for cable is how the DVR works. For some reason, most days it records the show just before it ends. Of course it's always a cliff hanger too!. The good guy is hanging off the roof by his finger nails while the bad guy proceeds to tap dance on his hands and then the next second I see - Save - Delete - Restart. Awesome! I find it just as irritating when I tape one show then go to watch it and it's a totally different show. It says the correct title but the taped show isn't even close to what I wanted. I should blame the actual television station for changing the programming. But honestly isn't that little box under the TV smart enough to figure out what I want to see? No? I mean for $82 a month and you get aggravation with it? I better buy stock in antacids or cut cable out of my life!

How to drive your co-workers crazy....

Ah Monday! The least favored day of the work week! This past week though my office was truly up in arms with you, Monday. We came in to a huge sign on the coffee machine stating "Out of Service"! Oh the grimaces and groans were endless. Sure you can run down stairs to one of the big coffee shops but not when your motto is "If it's for free, it's for me"! It's amazing how many free beverages are consumed here daily. So while everyone stood around the office willing the coffee machine to produce at least one more fresh pot, I laid in wait for the room to empty and then attacked. In my desk I have a jar of instant coffee as an emergency backup. I put the coffee in, added hot water and fanned the top of my cup allowing the fragrance to waft through the office. A mad panic preceded! People kept coming into the break room checking to see if the machine was now functioning. One by one checking. I heard them asking each other...Was that coffee I just got a whiff of? Do you think they fixed the machine?
Oh I didn't just torture them all morning, I did the same routine in the afternoon!

Are the authorities familiar with your menu?

Honestly, I'm not the most adventurous diner. When someone suggested I try oxtail I thought that was exotic. I mean I eat beef, it's really the same thing. So maybe it's my lack of gourmet experience that makes me question the chalk board at a neighborhood restaurant. I have to be honest, it's been there for months. At first I viewed it as a mistake but now maybe it my naivety I need to question. There are a host of names for sandwiches including subs grinder, hoagie, and the po' boy to name a few. But what are "handwiches" and does the police station a few doors down know you are selling them? I'll continue to pass on this dining adventure for now....

Et tu Mercury?

Apparently, Brute is not the only back stabber. Mercury is also up to no good! Many people don't believe in astrology but after this week, I'm a convert. Once Mercury heads into retrograde trouble begins! First, my cell phone got it on the double Ides! I dont know what happened, it just decided it had enough and stopped functioning. Well, the whole phone ceased to exist as I knew it except for the alarm which continued to ring. Next I decided to head out on a road trip but the minute I left the city limits my GPS performed an audition for the Twilight Zone. Even though I continued driving my GPS claimed I was at my former location.   Afer several attempts to repower with no luck I tossed it aside. Eventually, I gave it another try and it went back on which would have been awesome but that bad boy Mercury reared his ugly head and wiped out all my contacts! Unlike Ceasar I refuse to fall!